So a few of you may be fans by now. Or maybe this is your first visit to The Red Couch community. Wonderful! We are glad you are here. However, we want to make a few things clear so that we don’t send mixed messages or foster confusion with our members. It has been said, if you confuse them you lose them. So in the spirit of being transparent and honest, we are posting 5 types of people The Red Couch IS FOR and 5 types of people The Red Couch is NOT FOR.
The Red Couch is for…
1. Open minded, non-judgemental MARRIED couples and long term committed couples.
Over the past year of swinging, we have found better experiences with couples that were either married or in long term committed relationships. We have also found a need for a place for those couples to share, communicate and grow together while navigating the naughty world of sexual exploration. We aren’t against unicorns and others, but there are plenty of other forums for that. If you are following us and are a single individual, you’ll be removed.
2. Consensual, non-monogomous couples.
Besides the fact you’re married, you also don’t mind sharing your spouse with playful friends. The key word is consent. Both parties are either working their way toward or are enthusiastically interested and have permission to share their partners, sexually, within the parameters they both have negotiated and expressed to each other.
3. Couples that are satisfied in their own relationship, but want to experience more adventure and sexual freedom.
Swinging isn’t about trying to replace your partner. The Red Couch is for couples that have decided to stay together and explore the wonderful world of sexual adventure TOGETHER. While every relationship has room to grow, they are satisfied to the extent that they are deeply in love and share a special bond together.
4. Couples that are making investments in their marriage.
The Red Couch exists primarily to promote marital intimacy between your partner and others. Those of us who are in long term relationships realize that it takes work and investment to make things work. This means the people we play with are considered desert on the menu, but not the main course. You and your spouse are the most important relationship in the room and you are committed to invest in becoming deeper and closer in intimacy.
5. Gentleman/Ladies in the streets, freak in the sheets. 🙂
The Red Couch is for couples that could be your neighbor next door couple, but are freaky pervs behind closed doors. We believe there is absolutely nothing wrong with sexual expression and we especially encourage it within the context of your marital or committed relationship. Get as nasty as you want! Try a variety of things! Take the limits off.
Who The Red Couch is NOT FOR…
1. Single men/females or recently dating couples
Sorry guys. While we enjoy adding the additional single to our playtime on occasion, we really prefer to play with couples. There are plenty of other forums for you to find couples to play with. Without trying to sound snobby, recent couples that met on Tinder a few weeks ago just don’t do it for us. We would find it awkward if we all played together and then found out a week later that you two broke up. No thanks.
2. Cheaters
Do we need to explain? If you’re going behind your spouses back in hopes to try and “turn them” to the lifestyle, this isn’t the group for you. We understand people have their reasons, but please just be brave enough to have a conversation with your spouse about what you want. You might be surprised! Until then, The Red Couch isn’t for you. If we find out your cheating behind your spouses back, you will be removed from our community.
3. Couples in crisis
Swinging will not save your marriage if you have problems in other areas. If you’re an asshole or a bitch, no amount of sex is going to help you out. If you have a drug problem or drinking problem, the answer is not swinging. In fact, it could possibly make things worse. We recommend getting some professional counseling and when you feel your relationship is stable again, try to introduce swinging to your relationship again.
4. Couples trying to push a certain sexual agenda
We believe in tolerance and open mindedness to all different forms of non-monogomy, but we do not try and push anything on anyone. There are many variations within consensual non-monogamy and we respect them all. However, this is primarily a swingers group and that brings it’s own boundaries that should be respected. We all should be open to listen, ask questions and seek to understand without judgement. We also should never feel “less than” because we don’t subscribe to a certain flavor of sexual expression or relationship status.
5. Couples choosing to repress themselves
It goes without saying that if having sex with others, being naked around others or having sex in front of others bothers you, then you shouldn’t be here. Maybe you joined the wrong forum or found us by mistake. If you’re repressed in your sexuality, our content might offend you and you should just avoid engaging with it.
While this isn’t an exhaustive documentation set in stone, we hope it communicates clearly who we created The Red Couch for and who it’s NOT for. I’m sure there would be a few things we all could add or take away from this list to make this the ideal community we’d like to be a part of, but we hope that something here resonates with you and your spouse in hopes to create a safe place for you to express yourself and find the ability to release your inner slut. 🙂
Thanks for creating this site. My wife and I have recently just discussed opening our relationship and there’s not a lot of info out there detailing what it’s like for married couples. We haven’t set any rules for ourselves yet, we’re still in discovery mode. Any tips on first steps for us?
Hey Bob. Hope this journey for you is an exciting one! Obviously it takes lots of open communication to get to a place where you are opening up your relationship. You will experience an array of emotional ups and downs. Our best advice would be to create some boundaries surrounding what you’d be ok with and what you wouldn’t be ok with. Next check out one of the local swingers clubs and just go as an observer. You don’t have to do anything, just meet a few people and watch. If you feel adventurous, you can be with each other and get off on being in the same room as others. It can be quite a ride. Stay posted on some upcoming meet ups we have scheduled. Thanks for reading!