I get it, we’re here to fuck.
That being said, intimacy is more than just sex. You’re fooling yourself if you think that simply pounding your wife’s pussy into oblivion (although wanted and needed) 🙂 is going to, alone, lead to a fulfilling, deep connected sexual experience.
In a recent revelation in our own marriage, we found that although we were experiencing some amazing sessions in the bedroom, our non-sexual intimacy was lacking. This can cause all sorts of problems, especially if you adopt the swinger lifestyle. If the home fires aren’t lit at home with strong communication and a sense of bonding and connectedness with your partner, you’re setting yourself up for destruction inviting others into your bedroom.
That’s why we’ve put together 5 damn good ways to increase non-sexual intimacy in your relationship:
The benefits of a 10 minute massage before bed can do wonders for feeling warmth and connectedness. My wife especially likes her feet rubbed and massaged. (She even claims I can make her cum this way!). Pull out the massage oil and light a candle and work your way around her wonderland. If it leads to sex, ok! If not, that’s ok too!
2. Hand Holding
We joke about hand holding and long walks on the beach, but seriously…this could stir up some super warm fuzzies and get your love bank filled. I like to hold my wife hand while we sleep. I’ve often told her my favorite part of the day is when we get to go to bed together. Even if we haven’t been sexually intimate that night, I will grab her hand and hold it while falling asleep.
3. Experience Non-Sexual New Things Together
My wife and I love to explore new towns together that we haven’t been before. Just last weekend we took an impromptu trip to Rockford, a town about an hour away we’ve never been. We enjoyed just walking along the river together, exploring some new eats and brews. We even hit up an Army surplus store in her mini-skirt and went to a gay bar for the first time together. Find an adventure you both have been wanting to try and pull the trigger together.
4. Leave Love Notes
Not everyones “love language” is touch. Sometimes your partner wants to be told in words how much you love, respect and appreciate them. We have a love box in our home that we keep our love letters and notes in. (It’s been lacking lately) One day I came home and my wife wrote something hot and loving in washable marker on the bathroom mirror for me to find. Get creative! It doesn’t have to be long, short sweet nothings are important.
Especially the slow jam. 🙂 Fast dancing can be fun too! Throw on your favorite Pandora station or song on Spotify and grab his hand and pull them in. It doesn’t matter how well you dance, but dancing can be a super vulnerable moment you can share with your partner. Lots of guys don’t like to dance, but I’ve loved to watch guys who typically look like biker dudes get out on the dance floor with their partner for the fun of it. She will appreciate you to another level!
Sometimes love is like a flame that flickers and fades. We can’t forget to do these simple things to keep our relationships strong and connected. I believe we can have more hot sexual encounters with our swing partners if our we are feeling bonded and connected with our spouses. What types of non-sexual intimacy suggestions do you have? Please feel free to share them with us.